前世今生谈爱情

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前世今生谈爱情
作者:紫空居士著    文章来源:般若文海
发表时间:2006年12月9日
  • 壹、前言
  • 贰、爱情本质上是愿力和业力的结合
  • 参、夫妻关系的类型
  • 肆、居士学佛面对因缘的态度

 
壹、前言
前世今生之后,我们会有什么爱情?
“十年修得同船渡,百年修得共枕眠”。会成为夫妻,除了爱情,也需要缘份。在世间寻寻觅觅,怎么会遇到他?是否在冥冥之中,姻缘天已注定?不仅众生迷惑,连学佛人也一样迷惑。
然而为什么在结婚之后,有的甜蜜幸福,有的“不是冤家不聚头”,有的却能依信仰,共修过一生呢?本文便来探讨这 些问题,提供同修参考。至于“如何经营爱情?”“如何化解彼此纷争?”“如何共修,又能圆满一生,又能修行有成?”则不在本文讨论范围内(这些有待大家共 同讨论,提供心得,以及善知识的指导)。
本文依次讨论爱情的本质,再讨论夫妻关系的类型,并将各类型特征加以说明。最后是有关居士学佛面对因缘时,建议的态度。

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夫妻相處之道

來源:淨空法師專集網http://www.amtb.tw @ Facebook

【夫妻相處之道】 –蔡禮旭老師講《弟子規》

人與人相處,只要遵守一個好方法,稱作「四攝法」,一定能相處融洽,這是人際關係法。夫妻之間相處亦如是。

第一、「布施」:就是現在講的多請客、多送禮。夫妻之間,可以常常饋贈一些小禮物,太太的心中就會覺得,先生到哪都會想到我。所以我們出差時,什麼都可以忘,就是不能忘記幫太太買個小禮物,禮輕情義重。遇到太太生日或者結婚紀念日,就要帶太太去吃館子,「妳煮飯真辛苦,來,我們去吃館子」,你這分心意會讓她覺得付出很值得。

第二、「愛語」:要多給予對方肯定,多給予對方安慰的言語。「愛語」不見得都是好聽的話,愛是真心關懷對方。太太要能相夫教子,所以面對先生有過失時,也要給予規勸,而規勸也要注意態度、方法。《弟子規》能不能解決夫妻問題?可以!「善相勸,德皆建」、「見人善,即思齊」,你都看對方的優點,他就會很喜悅。「恩欲報,怨欲忘」,時時想著太太的辛勞,先生的辛勞,關係一定會很好。牙齒與舌頭都會咬到,更何況是夫妻,怎麼可能沒有摩擦?但是要「怨欲忘」。

第三、「利行」:人往往會很健忘,所以要常常幫對方記住一些重要的事,也要時時處處想著如何利益對方。譬如今天先生下班回來比較晚,我們要表達心意,就要把走廊的燈打亮,讓他不會覺得回家時漆黑一片,然後桌子上再放一張字條:「我幫你煮了一碗麵,辛苦了,吃完再睡覺。」這也屬於「利行」,他會覺得工作再辛勞,都有一個人陪伴著他。

第四、「同事」:夫妻共同的事業是什麼?家業。一定要把家庭經營好,把下一代教育好。而教育孩子的問題,夫妻之間要多做溝通,而把這些正確觀念跟另一半講時,態度也不能太強迫。所以「同事」是要建立共同的正確觀念。

The Journey is the Destination

Quote from One Tree Hill:

" Looking back on what I said all those years ago, all the hopes and dreams I had, I've come to the conclusion that if having things turn out the way you wanted them to is a measure of a successful life, then some would say I'm a failure.

The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments. Learn to let go of the past, and recognize that every day won't be sunny. And when you find yourself lost in the darkness of despair remember, it's only in the black of night that you see the stars, and those stars lead you back home.

So don't be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble and fall, because most of the time the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wish for. Maybe you'll get more than you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you. The road is long and in the end,

The Journey Is The Destination.

 


Nice comment from a friend:

It's quite pointless to compare the results ultimately, so what?

The richness is within the journey that each individual uniquely experience, to grow and come to our own understanding.

That's why life is actually a own journey, no matter how many companions we have, along the way.

We can only answer to our self that "Hey! This journey has not been wasted at the very end." if we have defined its meaning on our own.